I encourage you to choose your values. But if you have ever considered the question “where do values come from?” you know that there is no simple answer. When we are young, our decision-making and values are guided by our families and caregivers. As we get older, the circle expands to include peers, people we admire, authority figures, and the media.
You choose your values as you live your life, as you make little decisions and life-altering ones. This applies in both your personal and your professional life.
As you live your life, you say “yes” to certain things. These are priorities or things that are important to you. These are what you value.
When you choose your values in this manner—day by day, as life and work circumstances present themselves—you may get off course or make decisions that are not aligned with your core values. You need a better decision-making model. Identify your core values first, before you need to act on them. This will keep you from going along with the crowd, seeking instant gratification, pursuing short-term gain at the expense of your future, and avoidance behaviors.
In choosing values, it helps to know where they come from.
Family members model values that we internalize even without realizing it. As you mature, you can adjust these values to what is most important to you. You may choose more work-life balance or better stewardship. You may choose to keep Sundays as family day.
The media tries to influence our choice of material possessions as well as our opinions about politics and religion. As adults, it is our responsibility to be role models for the next generation who need to learn to form their own values.
Your faith also plays a part in what you value. What you learn spiritually can guide you throughout your life.
Educational settings were another opportunity to learn values. Administrators, bus drivers, parents of other children, your peers, service workers, and teachers all modelled some values. You were exposed to learning, creativity, tolerance for other people’s differences as well as the art of compromising. As you got older, you probably learned that some people did not value the same things you did but you were able to honor your values anyway.
Every one of us has values, and we share many common values. If you haven’t already done so, now is the time to ask yourself-
• “What is really important to me?”
• “How can I become more conscious of living a values-based life?”
• “How can I align my behaviors with my core values?”
Answering these questions will help you choose your values so they guide your life and work decisions for the best possible outcome. If you are having trouble identifying your core values, take my “Identify Your Personal Values” assessment found in “Core values: define and align them.”