Are you good at evaluating relationships or do you let them take their course—some growing and flourishing, others becoming stagnant, and others dying due to lack of common interest? As you near retirement, it’s more important than ever to assess the state of your relationships and take action.
Consider your special relationships first. Who among your family and friends will add value to your transition to retirement? Because retirement doesn’t happen in isolation, which people will be most affected by your plans? These quality relationships will mean more to you than money as time progresses.
Your spouse or partner should be on your list. As I wrote in “Togetherness in retirement: for better or worse not for lunch,” you should both be exploring your interests and dreams now. Discover how you want to spend time as individuals and as a couple now and in the future. You also need to discuss
• Are there extended family responsibilities that will affect your decisions?
• Who will be affected by your retirement (family, friends, and colleagues)?
• Where do you want to live?
• How do you feel about travel?
• Have you saved for the lifestyle you desire?
• How will you spend your new-found time?
As you are evaluating relationships, think about friends and colleagues, too. These relationships take work especially after you retire. The more interests you share, the easier this may be.
Adult children and grandchildren will also be relationships worth nurturing. Remember to practice good communication. Set and respect boundaries. Find a balance that will leave all of you wanting just a little more time together.
Evaluating relationships can begin with these questions:
• Is this family member, friend, or colleague important to me?
• Is this relationship a quality relationship?
• Do I want to nurture this relationship?
• Do I want to make time for interactions with this person?
• Will this person make time for me?
• Who is most supportive of what I have planned for my future?
• What do I still need to communicate about my retirement plans with my adult children?
• How do my work friends and I want to stay in touch?