Aging Is A Privilege—Do Not Take It For Granted
With the arrival of spring, you can almost feel the energy in the air. It is that time of the year when seniors graduate, couples get married, and kids get ready to begin enjoying their summer vacations. It’s about commencements, new beginnings, and hope for many as they look to their futures with anticipation.
This year it was more personal for me than normal because I recently attended my youngest niece’s graduation from the University of Virginia. When I heard the loud roar of graduates’ voices in response to hearing the words “You are now graduated,” I felt a lump in my throat. Just like it was yesterday, I remembered the hope and anticipation I had many years ago at my own graduation. Recalling those vivid memories, I felt excited for these young people who will, hopefully, have long and bright futures ahead of them.
Reflections
Some of you may have recently read the interview with actress Laura Linney in Parade magazine. She commented on being at peace with the aging process. She was quoted as saying, “I consider aging to be a privilege that not everyone gets, and I’m grateful for where I am.” When I read that statement, it stopped me in my tracks. It made me realize how much I feel privileged to have been able to be present for the last of my nieces’ and nephews’ graduations along with numerous other significant life events. That gift of experiencing these most important moments in life is truly a privilege.
As I was reminiscing about all the happy events I’ve witnessed, I thought of my mother. Every Mother’s Day, I get sentimental thinking of my mother who died of cancer at the young age of 54. She never lived to see all of her children grow up. She also missed knowing her grandchildren and experiencing the special moments in their lives. On the other hand, we’re fortunate to still have my dad, who is 95 years old. He has had the privilege of living a long life and experiencing all those wonderful family events. It reminds me of that old saying, “Life isn’t always fair.”
Living In The Presence Of Gratitude
Having lived through life’s many important family milestones, I feel grateful for where I am. Instead of being focused on either looking back or looking forward, I want to take the time to appreciate more of what I have today.
Too many people don’t stop to appreciate where they are in their lives. Unfortunately, it’s the human condition that too many of us see our glass as half empty instead of half full. Many spend their time concentrating on their aches and pains, losses, and disappointments instead of being thankful for each and every day they are alive. All of the research points to the fact that a positive mental attitude makes a huge difference in how one feels and how one heals. How many of you are consciously grateful for having lived long enough to experience and appreciate all the wonderful things life has brought you?
More Perspective On The Privilege Of Aging
Many of the audiences I speak to about retirement have had the privilege of enough longevity to experience life, work accomplishments, getting married, and raising children. The sad truth is that many of you have family members, friends, and colleagues who didn’t have that wonderful opportunity. When I do my presentations to these privileged individuals, we talk about what it will be like to leave work. We discuss their plans for re-careering, working part-time or full-time, and volunteering. I also ask them to think about how other family, friends, and colleagues will be affected by their retirement. I sense that some in the audience are preoccupied with a sense of loss instead of being excited about the new opportunities life will offer them. Others anticipate the joy of what is coming next and continue to see their glass as half full. With the right attitude, there is so much to look forward to.
Current research, reported in The Economist, shows the result of researchers who have begun to measure well-being in terms of happiness, not financial indicators. The results confirm what has been called the U-Bend of Happiness. The findings indicate that happiness increases from ages 20 to 30, decreases from 30-50 and then begins to increase again after 50. This makes sense because during the period of 30 to 50 there are so many stressors associated with getting married, raising children, and achieving career aspirations. This also confirms that as we get older and have more life experience, wisdom, and appreciation of accomplishments, we have the capacity to view life more positively. Not only have we lived until this point in time, we have developed the confidence in ourselves to overcome the normal, everyday obstacles in life. We know we can do it because we’ve done it before.
Staying In The Moment
If you are reading this newsletter, you have been fortunate enough to experience the privilege of aging. As you think about your future and what it holds for you, never lose sight of what you are thankful for today. Having a positive attitude is extremely important in making you feel happy and successful in life. Research consistently shows that happier people live longer.
So remember to always keep your glass half full and when it looks like it might be getting below half full, find the things you love and appreciate to fill it up again. Keep ample reserves of gratitude and happiness.
Here are some tips to help you accomplish that goal:
- Keep a daily list of people and life experiences you are grateful for.
- Appreciate nature and never miss an opportunity to watch a sunrise or sunset.
- Hug the people you love as often as possible.
- Cherish the good memories and learn from the not-so-good memories.
- Make your community a better place by using your life experiences, talents, and positive attitude.
Honor your privilege of aging by making sure you take time to appreciate what you have today while continuing to make the very best of the rest of your life.
Dee
Dee Cascio
Author, speaker, Licensed Psychotherapist, Certified Life Coach, Retirement Lifestyle/ReCareer Coach, and Life and Work Transitions Strategies Coach.
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