Get Your Legal Documents In Order
In the early 1960s, Elizabeth Kubler Ross pioneered a movement to understand the process of death and dying. She created a model to help all of us understand how important it is to go through the grieving process associated with the death of a loved one. Her research resulted in her writing a groundbreaking book, entitled On Death and Dying, to help raise our awareness. This book is still in print and has a lot of significance to the subject of this newsletter.
This month’s topic has to do with planning what will happen with your possessions and assets after you pass away. Ultimately, you should have legal documentation in place so the grieving process for your loved ones isn’t complicated by your lack of instructions. You owe it to your family to have plans IN WRITING so they will know exactly how to proceed when you are no longer able to make those decisions.
Twelve years ago my husband, Tom, and I did our first version of our wills and trusts. Since the laws and our situation have changed and because we have a blended family, we are now completing our third iteration of these complicated documents. You may have gone through this process or you may be at the very beginning or middle stages of planning. As expensive and uncomfortable as this subject can be, it is extremely important to complete these documents while you are still able to do so.
Needless to say, some of the issues involved with this planning process are thought-provoking. They can also be controversial and even depressing. At the same time, they can be very liberating, reassuring, and an acknowledgement of the hard work and accomplishments of your working years. However, no matter how this process affects you personally, your family will someday appreciate the time and effort you spent to make your wishes known.
An Unplanned Death
My husband had a friend many years ago who died suddenly at age 55 without a will. His parents had died five years earlier in a car accident and the only remaining family he had left were two sisters. Because there was no will, the court was preparing to step in and probate the estate which would have involved the loss of a significant amount of money.
While the courts have a well-established process for dealing with people who die without wills, the process isn’t inexpensive. The courts will usually appoint an attorney to administer the estate. After these court-appointed attorneys finish the process, the money left for family is greatly diminished. Because my husband had been a close friend, had past experience with probating wills, was willing to help out, and the sisters also knew Tom, they petitioned the court to appoint my husband to administer the estate. Without legal documents in place, it still took 18-24 months to complete the process.
This is a good example of why it is so important to complete legal documents not only for legal reasons but also to protect family relationships. His sisters, who lived in two different states, were totally overwhelmed and would have had no idea of where to begin. They would have spent tens of thousands of dollars with a court-appointed attorney who would have charged them for every phone call, document, etc. that would’ve been required.
Protect Yourself And Your Loved Ones
Many family relationships have been permanently damaged by this lack of appropriate legal guidance. Although unpleasant, some time spent now can help family members know how to proceed when you are no longer living. Without those legal documents, the state takes over and your relatives can spend years in litigation trying to sort out who gets what, when, and where. In the meantime, close as well as distant relatives could be circling for their “fair share.” I don’t think this is the kind of legacy that any of you would like to leave for your loved ones.
Completing this process doesn’t mean that you are going to die soon. What it does mean is that you will be well prepared out of respect for yourself as well as your family. Now is the time for you to plan how to direct family members to do what is right for you and your estate.
Below is a checklist of those documents that you should complete and have all in one place long before you retire:
- Defined Benefits and Contribution Documents
- Documentation of Investments
- Documentation of Insurance Policies
- Will
- Trust
- Durable Power of Attorney for Finances and Healthcare
- Medical Release of Information
- Medical Directive
- Tax Documents
- Five Wishes
- Directions For Where You Keep Your Legal Documents
As you can see, getting all of your documents in order is of utmost appoint importance no matter what stage of life you are in. If you haven’t done so already, find an attorney that can help you construct your will and trust, making sure all the above documents are in one place so they can be easily accessed. We don’t have a crystal ball to determine our fate. But you do have time, if you act promptly, to leave a legacy of responsibility that you can be proud of.
Now go make the very best of the rest of your life.
Dee
Dee Cascio
Author, speaker, Licensed Psychotherapist, Certified Life Coach, Retirement Lifestyle/ReCareer Coach, and Life and Work Transitions Strategies Coach.
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