Why do some people refuse to retire? Perhaps they don’t know what they don’t know, as was the case with our grandson.
He became a member of our family at five-years-old when my step-son married his mother who had moved here from Columbia, South America. When he first arrived, his whole world became new… a new language, a new country, a new school, and a new family. It was obviously overwhelming to the little guy. Seeing him struggle, my husband, Tom, decided to make him a priority. We wanted him to grow up feeling secure in his new country and his new family, including having a positive male role model. Tom made it a point to spend at least one afternoon a week with him, doing fun things for a child like going out to eat or to the movies, exploring the zoo, or sometimes just taking a walk. I think it’s an understatement to say that the two of them bonded in a very special way and shared some wonderful conversations. One, when he was 12, involved Tom talking about growing up to become a man and someday liking girls. The immediate response was, “That’s not going to happen!”
And so it goes with those nearing retirement age who refuse to retire, and it reminds me of frequent conversations I have had over the years with friends, relatives, and acquaintances. Some have been as adamant as our grandson by proclaiming “I will never retire.” This refusal to even consider the possibility of any lifestyle beyond the present work-a-day world is not foreign even to me. Before finding my own rewarding retirement lifestyle, I felt much the same way.
But, let’s face it: Just like teenage boys eventually discover girls, all of us will eventually retire. Sometimes it is by choice. Other times it is the result of external factors such as a lay-off or health issues. Whatever the circumstances, if we look openly at retirement for the opportunities it presents, we can discover a very rewarding lifestyle. Instead, many dig in their heels and put off retirement as long as possible. They commit to that “Never!” mindset. Unfortunately, this resistance only prolongs the inevitable and makes it impossible to actively move forward in life. If we become stuck, we miss some wonderful possibilities that would otherwise await us.
So Why Do People Refuse To Retire?
People continue working past the time when they might otherwise retire for various reasons. Unfortunately, some are compelled to work because of economic circumstances. We all know people who have encountered adverse circumstances or haven’t planned effectively for their financial needs. Others are fortunate enough not to encounter financial difficulty but continue to work because they honestly don’t know what else to do with their time. Their entire life, as well as their identity, is tied up in their work.
If you are compelled to work for financial reasons, retirement coaching can help you define options where you can both enjoy your retirement and pursue financial goals. If you continue to work because it is the only way you currently identify yourself as productive and satisfied, my retirement lifestyle coaching can help define the ways your current work provides these essential benefits and find other similarly rewarding retirement opportunities. You don’t need to lose your sense of “self” as you transition to your desired retirement lifestyle. As rewarding as your work may be, or as prestigious as your work title is, it is not the essence of who you are. Your strengths and talents led you to these career achievements and in the same way, they can lead you to another quality lifestyle after full-time work.
Don’t refuse to retire. Find a healthy balance between work and other interests. Nothing says that a retired person’s life shouldn’t include work as an important part of a balanced lifestyle. After all, work isn’t the enemy of a successful retirement but an attitude of rigidity, inflexibility, and resistance is. Whether we choose to work or need to work as part of our retirement, the kind of work and the balance achieved with our other life interests are key to establishing a rewarding next stage in life.